Sunday 31 March 2013

Happy Easter

Saw this today on a notice board; I find it very funny!

Interesting is the notion of a self, sort of separate from but affected by the body... The joke is around awareness... Or so I suppose.

However you view the resurrection of Christ, however you interpret 'spirit' may the light be with you. Happy Easter.

Saturday 30 March 2013


Comming down from Cairngorm

 Lock Morlich

After many grey days today was bright and beautiful. I knew it would be exhilarating on Cairngorm and at loch Morlich. It was; the white snow, blue sky and green evergreen trees were truly stunning. I took a visitor to these parts with me and he loved it. Sharing adds to the experience. Solitude brings a particular connection with one's self and the world and has a place. But sharing a thing, a view, whatever, can add to the enjoyment of it. On a day like today, with no worries in mind and having been busy and productive yesterday and in the moment taking in a wonderful view, life is good.

Sunday 24 March 2013

Spiritual Deepening

Towards the end of the week I found out that I did not get either of two jobs for which I'd attended interviews the previous week. All interviews had gone very well; a phone interview then a face to face in each case. Feedback at all stages was very positive yet in the end the permanent job was given to a 'slightly stronger candidate' and the other, a temporary job is now on hold until they work out if they can use existing resource. I was disappointed but this disappointment was tempered by the knowledge that I had a 'gut feeling' that both jobs had some issue / problem around them. So emotionally the task was to feel in to the various options that might arise; one offer, two offers, timing etc. to best be able to make a decision without getting too attached in case the result was no offer. I seem to have managed that for the most part but obviously it's also rather draining. Expanding beyond the wish to have job, relationship and house all in one area, there is the need to make home be where 'I' am and with what is. And as part of that to hold 'I' lightly; not to beat myself up and / or make 'things heavy'. There is no separate 'I'. DC reminded me today as we skyped that this is about more than just 'a job'; it's about the place (or mind set / awareness) which I am in. This is something which I was sitting with when considering the potential of each job and my being back in the Findhorn Foundation holding a number of built environment projects. Added to this consideration at the mental and 'gut' levels were several comments made by people that there is work here for me to do. I was also asked to consider really letting go the fears and attachments; the aspects that drain energy away and to truly responded to what is in front. In this place we must 'eat our rice'. All of it! No shoving it around the plate, no wanting some other rice or ignoring part of it and yet also no thinking that we see the whole plate. This is where the job is - holding and delivering projects in the Findhorn Foundation. Some part of my own process probably fears losing the skill set to 'get things done' out in the commercial world and even without any fearful aspect there is just the difference in sensibility between the two ways of working and living. And DC was making a point not just about holding whatever arises lightly. More than that, his point was that not only do I still have the 'get things done ability', I also have a spiritual awareness.  And as DC pointed out, I am at home in both the world of the commercial construction sector and the world of a spiritually focused community. His point was to see the ongoing spiritual deepening in this interplay between purpose (or job), self and home. In a way this is a point about the interplay of being and doing; being the fullest person possible who does what there is to do. That's more than just a job.

RM Mugo points to this being with what is in this post on Jade Mountain Buddha Hall and the post links to a post on Field Of Merit by Rev Alicia. I suppose both posts in a way point to the creative moment and the liberation of not just tolerance but acceptance. The rice is rather enjoyable then, even if it's not quite what might be otherwise chosen. Although sometimes I find some spoonfuls most unpalatable! That opening paragraph in RM Mugo's post certainly struck a chord with me. And I am not talking about job rejections here. No, sometimes life is very hard. Yet this very difficulty, the very sadness inherent in it, affords the most beautiful meaning to our lives.

At present my job is in the FF and it is here because I've the ability to get things done in the built environment as part of a practical spirituality.

Tuesday 19 March 2013


Time flows on; an other windowsill, an other bloom. Compare with a post last year. Again I have the amaryllis on loan whilst my friend is away. I recalled last years pictures but until I looked I'd not known the post title was 'Time passing'. The wheel turns. Although the weather is still cold and there has been snow this past week in parts of the UK, there is more than a hint the winter is drawing to an end as hints of spring start to swell in the buds of garden plants and house plants like the amaryllis do their thing. There has been much toing and froing over the last few weeks and I am sitting waiting to see what the results will be; where I wonder, will I be over the summer?

Friday 8 March 2013

Nicholas Heiney

On Wednesday I listened to a program on Radio 4 in which the writings of Nicholas Heiney were brought to life. I was at times in tears. He was clearly a beautiful and gifted 'soul'. He committed suicide aged twenty three and I wondered; would I feel so moved by his writing if he was still alive? I think the answer is yes! For me he seems to have touched (at such a young age) and described with great clarity, and wisdom the very kernel of human life, the very heart of spiritual awareness.  There is (for me) something of the utmost importance in the expression of such wisdom in the life of a person. Bless you Nicholas.

His writings have been collated in to a book:


Monday 4 March 2013

A Little Aside

I overheard this today and could not but chuckle;

'Our group has been decimated; half of them have gone over to the park.'

One in Two

There is a Oneness to be found in two which is not so distinctly accessible in say three. I am thinking of the communion possible between two people, especially lovers. A pairing of two people in the sexual act gives rise to a sense of oneness / Oneness which is quite possibly available in groups but certainly much harder to locate. What is interesting in this I think is the axis that exists between a sense of aloneness / separateness and unity ( / Unity), and in particular the part that sex and various forms of love play in the location of this axis. In making eye contact with an other person we form a connection which (inevitably) excludes (except perhaps in our imagination) the other eyes that might be around us. In this connection we see / know ourself and the (so called) other to be joined. This knowing is not the same as the a concept or thought held in the mind, a concept such as the awareness of others being there but not looked at. It is a direct communion. This  direct communion happens in groups but not in my experience in the way and depth of my communion with one (so called) other.